Becoming Something
RCW

It seemed as if there was hope once.
I had hoped that these thoughts would
at sometime become something, someone,
an Us.
The words tumbled out of my mouth
Let go, let go, let go.
Hoping and praying as they came out
that you would deny them, smite them,
send them flying away from us and out,
away from my thoughts and
banishing my nightmares.

Before those words, it seemed as if there
was something to work towards,
a possibility of something, someone,
of Us.
I could imagine it, hold it in my mind
roll around thoughts of waking up next to
you.
Of having that feeling everyday.
It was a goal to work towards, a problem to be solved
or, as you would say, a situation to be explored.

My thoughts, my nightmares, my dreams
all of them (or at least most) revolved around
something becoming something, becoming someone,
becoming Us.
You were there every night as I slept,
some specter of you found its way into my dreams.
You were there but absent, real but beyond reach,
every night, you were there, whether I wanted you
there or not (though, most nights, I assure you I did)

Those words came out, tumbling, stumbling
off of my tongue, through my teeth and out of my mouth,
silently, stupidly, defensively destroying the possibility
of something turning into someone, into something,
into Us.
‘I’ve been thinking about a lot of the same things.
I think you’re right.’
Let go. let go. let go.
Silently, stupidly, defensively I say goodbye,
while thoughts, nightmares and dreams remain,
your specter finding me while I sleep.
You were there, I felt you.
And though you are not gone,
it still seemed
as if there
was
hope.
once.

For You
RCW

I've been lacking passion lately
Lacking passion to persist.
I've been lacking that motivating principle
Lacking the motive to resist.
I've been lacking passion,
Lacking passion in my kiss.
I've been lacking passion lately,
Passion that has become amiss.

I've been lacking passion lately,
In my touch, in my eyes, in my kiss.
I've been lacking that motivating principle
To be with them (any of them) or to persist.
I've been lacking passion,
My dreams and wants have gone amiss.
I've been lacking passion lately,
but, with You, I can't resist.

I've been lacking passion lately,
My intentions had gone amiss.
I've been lacking that motivating principle,
But now I have my motive to kiss.
I've been lacking passion,
A passion now I won't resist.
I've been lacking passion lately,
And I shall, I must persist.

Brought To You by Nostalgia
RCW

I’m here, now, much like Sarah said last night;
A revision of a revision of a revision.
I don’t know what to anticipate but life itself.

By the time you reach what you want,
It’s already gone, out of sight, because it changed
Memorization serves no purpose-
Dust turns to dust-
It is transformed and nothing is the same anymore.

I feel tired but good.
I promised Rose that I would take care of myself,
And I will.
I must
Or I will never be able to achieve all that I dream,
Whatever that may be.

I don’t know that there are concrete,
Physical places in my dreams
I can only know, hope and believe
That I will live with integrity and truth.

The wise remember past.
Stuck there.
Once changed.
There is no need.
For comparison.

Vagueness.
Drawing of immaculate detail.
Dancing in that moment,
It was pure, ecstatic joy.

See You Dancing
RCW

I close my eyes and I can see you dancing…

The music pulsating, penetrating,
Merely background to the symphony
Of your body.
Eyes closed in concentration,
Lashes long,
Highlighted by the intermittent lights.

Your lips, fiery red, pursed
Match your shirt,
Which, clinging to you,
Emphasizes the curve of your breasts,
The curve of your hips in movement.

Waves of glorious hair cascade down
Haloing perfection.
The golden strands fragrantly poignant.

Your hips move to the beat,
Your hands,
(One -resting on your stomach-
The second -flowing through your hair-)
Compose music of their own accord.

Fluidity.
A pure, unadulterated fringe of sky.
Your magnificence ensnares me,
Pulls at me from across the room.
The beckoning call, the alluring light that is
You.

Living art; a post-modern classic
Ornately simple, gorgeous in every respect
Radiating tranquility, solidity, serenity.

Holistic You. Perfect You. Awesome You.




Awe-filled me.

Finger Prints
RCW

Where have these hands been?
What have they touched?
Have they run through silky hair?
Or been burned by fire to the touch?

Have the sewed a child’s bonnet
Or tied a loose shoe lace?
Have they sat, entwined with
Lover’s, warm in sweet embrace?

Do they cook fragrant dinners
Or grace guitar chords?
Do they write long love letters
Or fold in prayer to the lord?

Have these fingers molded yellow clay?
Have they reached for the broad moonlight?
Have they brushed away a tear
Or held strong with all their might?

These fingers, on a journey
A flight from here to there
Of imaginations wonder,
Adventures new and rare

Perception
RCW

A cacophony of color
Spectrum of contrast,
Unlimited, boundless…

Swirled Van Gogh sky
Radiating out

The evolving gyre emotes

Prejudice; hate; judgment; naiveté; damnation;

All ill used

Infinite and ever present
Perpetual
Nameless, yet known to all…

And without…




Nothing.



No light.

No dark.




No nothing.


Conscience and lack thereof
A constant state of entropy

Morality, Normality, Formality.

…Thus Defined…

Phoenix
RCW

A phoenix in the dust
Rising up again
Its perpetual rebirth
Wearing itself thin

It’s life a continuous process
Of lying and cheating friends
Upon each existence
It does it, again and again

The bastard of the Father,
The Son and the Holy Ghost.
Beaten, bruised and left alone
By those who should love most

Led astray by the truth
To lead those about it the same
Using emotions, love and hate
To play its own sick game.

This lying, this forgiveness;
Eternal love based in fear
Beginning every morning
Ending each night in tears

Waking to shake the ashes off
To ignore the voice within
Rising with no lesson learned
To begin, again, in sin.

Sinfetti
RCW

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Little pieces of paper
Covered in words of sin
Torn, return and sprinkled about
The litter from within

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Rough and dirty, hard and fast
Lick her up, take her in
Ink and sweat, the dye is cast
Come on, take her for a spin

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Watch them come,
They sprinkle down
All the wrong
The world’s cruel crown

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Short shirts
Shorter skirts
Big flirts
Lots of dirt

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Rag dolls, tossed around
Pulled apart, torn to shreds
Fuck them all, all they are
Sin, sin, sin again

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run

Swinging parties
Swinging fun
Singing feet
The hanging done

Sinfetti
Lots of fun
Sinfetti
Morality on the run…

Overwhelmed
RCW

Voices in letters, violence in print
Ink of accusation, digitally spent
Lack of support, confusion in love
No guidance, no, none from above

Purpose created, intentions lost
Ego demanding, all at a cost
Questions arising, no answer here
Clarity absent, no, nothing is clear

Where do we go, what do we do?
Leave it alone or follow through?
Give it a chance or let it die?
Hello again or simply goodbye?

Resolution is needed, demanded by some
Depending on all, depending on one
Imbalance apparent, no scales to be found
Decided for yourself, bound or unbound

Limit your moments, shorten your days
Go through the motions, live through your plays
Intentions lost, all digitally spent
The time has come, gone and went

Where do we go, what do we do?
Leave it alone or follow through?
Give it a chance or let it die?
Hello again or simply goodbye?

Hello again or simply goodbye?

Confusion
RCW

Doubt, pain, questions...
Uncertainty
How hard could it be to make a decision?
Completely impossible.
Desire, longing, loneliness...
Alone
It’s not that hard, you can do it.
No, I can't.
Wishing, wanting, dreaming...
Futile
Get your head out of the clouds, make a decision
It’s not that easy.
Hope, faith, patience...
Reality
The real world, the real feelings come on fast, take time.
I try, I try.

Untitled
RCW

Go away
Thoughts, feelings, pain
Go away,
Stop, stop
Let me slip away
Let me be free
Stop bringing me back
Stop making me hope
Stop making me love you
Stop
Go away, Analise
Stop being wonderful
Make a decision
Stop leading me on
Leave me alone
Leave me alone or take me to you
Chose
Love hurts
It hurts

Untitled
RCW

Whispers of your name flow through my mind
They carry through my day
Gently reminding me of your face
Blindly I hope for better days that may not come
Harshly I remember my mistakes and what they caused
But they are gone, they matter no more
There is only the hope that lives within me
It is small, almost miniscule
Love conquers all, except perhaps distance
Pain relives itself over and over in my soul
I am stepping closer to the end
But the road is long and covered with darkness
It seems the tunnel never ends
Somewhere among these twists and turns is light
And I shall find it
With whispers of your name haunting me

Untitled
RCW

Thoughts are flowing, gliding through my mind
Some stick, catching on the jagged edges of my consciousness
Those thoughts wrap around securing themselves
The others quietly peeping their opinions as they disappear
Thoughts tug at my mind
The confuse, they solve, they sit and ferment
Growing ever larger, more complex
Hard to understand on the outside
But inside they are crystal clear
To find the inside I must accept
Accept them and learn with them
Thoughts develop ever more in my mind

Make Believe
RCW

Wishing, wanting, dreaming up situations
Pretending they could happen
Hoping they'll come true
If one, even just one became truth,
If only for a moment something wonderful happened
My soul would soar, my heart would burst
But as far as I can see
I'll pretend forever
Wishing, wanting, dreaming.

In My Mind
RCW

Trapped between reality and fantasy
Stuck between truth and lies
To many thoughts,
To many voices
What should I believe?
My heart or yours?
Keep trying?
Quit going?
What should I do?
Is there hope?
Maybe not.
Maybe so.
Maybe.
It’s all in my head........

You
RCW

You are amazing
Your voice lifts my heart
Your smile dries my tears
Your touch calms my fears
Your thoughts are mind bending
Your love is breath taking
Your eyes are soul searching
You are amazing